MASCULINE & FEMININE - THE CONVO IS MISSING THE MARK

There’s a lot of talk right now about masculine and feminine energy… and a lot of it seems to be missing the mark.

Let’s clear something up…

A man showing emotion isn’t feminine. It’s not weakness and it’s not soft. It’s powerfully masculine… when it comes from presence, depth, and honesty.

It’s as masculine as protecting his family; as standing in front of his home and saying, “not on my watch!”

You know what else needs to be said?

It is not masculine for a woman to be strong, independent, or protective. It is profoundly and powerfully feminine!

Hear me out: the scariest, most unpredictable force in the forest isn’t a male bear. It’s the mama bear and you know it.

The male bear will stand meters away from you, eating, and pay you no mind. He doesn’t threaten. He observes.

A mama bear on the other hand… Oh, you come within ANY kind of distance to her or her cubs and she will mess you up! She doesn’t beg you to leave, she protects with every cell of her being… and she will tear apart anything that gets too close to what she loves.

If you listen to nothing else I say in this post listen to this: when the masculine is absent or unsafe, the feminine doesn’t become masculine…

…her feminine expands!

She steps into her expanded feminine with the same energy she does with her babies… but when the masculine is absent, her energy becomes depleted. Why? Because she is now forced to use her feminine, protective energy for far more than she ever should have.

That was me for years.

I grew up without a father to protect me… I’ve been depleted, craving a strong, physically strong and protective masculine energy to carry the parts of me I wasn’t meant to. So I became the protector. I led. I provided. I nurtured, AND I survived… and I chose men who were not honest in their masculine because I thought it was safer. Masculine men, in my trauma, were the threat… or so I thought.

Turns out that survival is not the same as wholeness… and I was tired. Tired of being the strong one. Tired of carrying both the shield and the tender. Tired of protecting everyone while my own heart was left uncovered.

When I healed, I didn’t want to live from that place anymore. I wanted to be protected so I could focus on nurturing, serving from a heart that could. THAT is why we need both father and mother. Not so they both can act the same. But rather, so she gets to focus on nurturing and he gets to focus on protecting.

When he taps in to his deep honesty, from the safety her physical and emotional nurturing provides; When she taps into her deep honesty, from the safety his physical and emotional protection provides... it is profoundly magical.

A true masculine becomes tender when he feels safe to be vulnerable. He softens when he can put his shield down because his strength is respected. He opens when he is honoured; not criticized, not judged, not told he needs to be in touch with his feminine.

So let’s stop confusing emotional expression with femininity… and let’s stop shaming men for the fire they carry when no one’s ever let them drop the weight.

This isn’t about politics or pop psychology. This is about truth; primal, ancient, and sacred truth.

Masculinity and femininity are both strong; both tender… But they are not the same.

And when each is honored for what it is… we all get to come home.